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Monday Mom Stories

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My mother seems to have gained a weird following and approval among my friends for her FOB antics. She’s developed into some kind of folk hero or something. Here’s another mother story which occurred over a phone call.

The phone rings.

Me: Hello
Mom: Joohnnnnnyyyyyyyy!!!!
Me: Hi mom.
Mom: Did you call me?
Me: What?
Mom: Did you call me?
Me: No. You called me.
Mom: Johnny…
Me: What?
Mom: Johnny…
Me: Mom. What?
Mom: …are you sure?
Me: What? Am I sure what?
Mom: Are you sure you didn’t call me?
Me: Yes! You called me. I picked up the phone and said ‘Hi mom’
Mom: Oh okay.
Me: Okay?
Mom: I was just kidding
Me: Oh my gosh…
Mom: Johnny…
Me: Mom. What.
Mom: Put a shirt on
Me: What?
Mom: It’s cold. Put a shirt on.
Me: …
Mom: Johnny? Hello?
Me: How did you know I was shirtless?
Mom: Aiyo! Because I am mommy! Put your shirt on! You’ll catch a cold!
Me: Where are you?
Mom: At home.
Me: Are you sure? You’re not like in my backyard? How do you see me?
Mom: No I am at home!
Me: Hahahaha that is creepy mom
Mom: Hahahaha I know hahahahaha
Me: Hahaha no it’s not good to be creepy
Mom: I’m not creepy because I am mommy!
Me: Okay fine. That was pretty funny though. So what are you calling about?
Mom: Nothing. Just wanted to tell you to put a shirt on.
Me: What!? That’s it?
Mom: Yes, I have to go.
Me: Wait. You called just to tell me to put my shirt on?
Mom: Yes. Did you put your shirt on yet?
Me: No…
Mom: Do it. You’ll catch a cold.
Me: I’ll do it later
Mom: Okay I really have to go.
Me: Wait! You really just called to tell me that?
Mom: Yes. I have to go bye.
Me: Bye…

Written by jonewantsm3

February 4, 2013 at 1:00 am

Posted in Rant

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